A lesson in patience
Well it's almost been a month since my last post and we have still not received our State approval letter. I check the mail everyday in anticipation.
Even though we don't have an official State approval we have already gotten an email from our agency with a potential match! It is pretty exciting.
On 12/24/2018, our agency emailed me letting us know they've already received several inquiries about us from various counties. One inquiry is in regards to a 4 sibling caucasian group: 13 year old male, 11 year old female, 8 year old female, and 6 year old male. We emailed them back requesting more information on this group. However, we have not heard anything since.
We also haven't gotten a reply on when our Therapeutic Behavior Management training will be.
Throughout this entire process we've had to be incredibly patient. Every time I think we are getting close to our forever family more periods of delay hit us. Patience isn't my strong suit but I am always trying to become better in this area. The adoption process is surely one that will either build a person's patience up or just break it completely. We remain the former.
In addition to the adoption process, my health issues have brought up opportunities for developing patience. I was diagnosed with an ovarian mass in November but couldn't get in to see my OBGYN until December. Then she referred me to a Gynecological Oncologist who couldn't see me until yesterday.
Dealing with the almost constant pain and the two month delay in treatment options has been a trying experience. Getting in to see a doctor in the Atlanta area is very different than getting in to see one down in Tifton, GA. In Tifton, I could get in on the same day if needed. Now I am waiting for a minimum of a month each time.
Then there is the wait time when you get to your appointment. Yesterday I was told to be there thirty minutes before my appointment at 11 o'clock. I wasn't take back into a room until 1:30 pm. Another twenty minutes went by before the physician came in to do the physical examination. I waited another fifteen minutes in his office to discuss treatment plan. After that I had to wait another fifteen minutes to meet with the surgery scheduler and then another fifteen minutes for her to schedule it. I left the office at 3:08 pm. Talk about a lesson in patience!
However, I believe the wait was worth it. While I was waiting in his office I noticed several things that confirmed to me he was the right surgeon for my procedure. There were scripture verses on his desk, a cross hanging on the back of his office door, and a picture of Jesus guiding the hands of a surgeon during an operation. If someone has to cut me open I feel much more confident knowing that person believes in God and follows His guidance in his practice.
Of course, he is top in his field too. His office walls were blanketed with awards, diplomas, certificates, honors, etc... He is well trained in the use of the da Vinci robot for laparoscopic surgeries. In fact, he educates other physicians on how to use the da Vinci robot.
After reviewing my rather extensive history and the MRI results he has recommended the da Vinci to perform my total hysterectomy. If he should get in there and realize he needs to cut me open then he will do so at that time. I made sure he wasn't going to close me up and reschedule me for another day.
Now, with the da Vinci my surgery will require one night hospital stay and six weeks recovery. During those six weeks I will not be allowed to pick up anything heavier than ten pounds. Originally I was under the understanding it would be a two week recovery time so I was not prepared for this. Six weeks recovery is a hard pill to swallow for various reasons including finances, lack of hands on experience in the nursing field, and the inevitable boredom to come.
To combat the challenges of a six week recovery I am picking up extra shifts from now until then. Currently I am in school so I will have plenty of time to finish my classes and then I can do continuing education courses to keep my nursing mind sharp. As for the boredom, besides my school and CE's I think I will start my La Passacaglia quilt!!! I am very excited about starting that quilt. It is far more advanced than anything I have ever attempted before. The Facebook Group I am a part of is truly inspiring. They are incredibly precise with their piecing together of fabrics. I have much to learn from them.
Please keep us both in your prayers. On top of the adoption prayers we will need surgery and financial prayers.
I don't like to show my fears or weaknesses but I know I need the prayers right now. I was never anxious when it came to surgeries before this year. In July, I almost had a panic attack on the table waiting for them to put me under. Now I am having some fears in regards to this procedure.
First, I am afraid that I will wake up with a colostomy. I am actually kind of terrified of it. I am a nurse and know how to care for one but I don't know if I could emotionally handle having one myself. Then there are the questions of what I will or will not be able to do if I had one. Can I swim? I can't remember from what I learned in nursing school. Let's not forget about sex appeal with my husband. I want to always be attractive to him. (Side note here... I saw a post once of a quilter who made fabric bags to go around colostomy bags to make them more appealing. I'd totally do that.)
Second, I am afraid of the possibility of not waking up. I am by no means afraid of the afterlife. I look forward to the day that I meet God in Heaven. I just do not feel like I have finished my life here. I don't want to leave my husband. What would happen to him? I also very much want to experience motherhood before I leave this life.
Lord, please bring peace to me and my husband during this wait and the surgery. We are in your hands. - Amen
Even though we don't have an official State approval we have already gotten an email from our agency with a potential match! It is pretty exciting.
On 12/24/2018, our agency emailed me letting us know they've already received several inquiries about us from various counties. One inquiry is in regards to a 4 sibling caucasian group: 13 year old male, 11 year old female, 8 year old female, and 6 year old male. We emailed them back requesting more information on this group. However, we have not heard anything since.
We also haven't gotten a reply on when our Therapeutic Behavior Management training will be.
Throughout this entire process we've had to be incredibly patient. Every time I think we are getting close to our forever family more periods of delay hit us. Patience isn't my strong suit but I am always trying to become better in this area. The adoption process is surely one that will either build a person's patience up or just break it completely. We remain the former.
In addition to the adoption process, my health issues have brought up opportunities for developing patience. I was diagnosed with an ovarian mass in November but couldn't get in to see my OBGYN until December. Then she referred me to a Gynecological Oncologist who couldn't see me until yesterday.
Dealing with the almost constant pain and the two month delay in treatment options has been a trying experience. Getting in to see a doctor in the Atlanta area is very different than getting in to see one down in Tifton, GA. In Tifton, I could get in on the same day if needed. Now I am waiting for a minimum of a month each time.
Then there is the wait time when you get to your appointment. Yesterday I was told to be there thirty minutes before my appointment at 11 o'clock. I wasn't take back into a room until 1:30 pm. Another twenty minutes went by before the physician came in to do the physical examination. I waited another fifteen minutes in his office to discuss treatment plan. After that I had to wait another fifteen minutes to meet with the surgery scheduler and then another fifteen minutes for her to schedule it. I left the office at 3:08 pm. Talk about a lesson in patience!
However, I believe the wait was worth it. While I was waiting in his office I noticed several things that confirmed to me he was the right surgeon for my procedure. There were scripture verses on his desk, a cross hanging on the back of his office door, and a picture of Jesus guiding the hands of a surgeon during an operation. If someone has to cut me open I feel much more confident knowing that person believes in God and follows His guidance in his practice.
Of course, he is top in his field too. His office walls were blanketed with awards, diplomas, certificates, honors, etc... He is well trained in the use of the da Vinci robot for laparoscopic surgeries. In fact, he educates other physicians on how to use the da Vinci robot.
After reviewing my rather extensive history and the MRI results he has recommended the da Vinci to perform my total hysterectomy. If he should get in there and realize he needs to cut me open then he will do so at that time. I made sure he wasn't going to close me up and reschedule me for another day.
Now, with the da Vinci my surgery will require one night hospital stay and six weeks recovery. During those six weeks I will not be allowed to pick up anything heavier than ten pounds. Originally I was under the understanding it would be a two week recovery time so I was not prepared for this. Six weeks recovery is a hard pill to swallow for various reasons including finances, lack of hands on experience in the nursing field, and the inevitable boredom to come.
To combat the challenges of a six week recovery I am picking up extra shifts from now until then. Currently I am in school so I will have plenty of time to finish my classes and then I can do continuing education courses to keep my nursing mind sharp. As for the boredom, besides my school and CE's I think I will start my La Passacaglia quilt!!! I am very excited about starting that quilt. It is far more advanced than anything I have ever attempted before. The Facebook Group I am a part of is truly inspiring. They are incredibly precise with their piecing together of fabrics. I have much to learn from them.
Please keep us both in your prayers. On top of the adoption prayers we will need surgery and financial prayers.
I don't like to show my fears or weaknesses but I know I need the prayers right now. I was never anxious when it came to surgeries before this year. In July, I almost had a panic attack on the table waiting for them to put me under. Now I am having some fears in regards to this procedure.
First, I am afraid that I will wake up with a colostomy. I am actually kind of terrified of it. I am a nurse and know how to care for one but I don't know if I could emotionally handle having one myself. Then there are the questions of what I will or will not be able to do if I had one. Can I swim? I can't remember from what I learned in nursing school. Let's not forget about sex appeal with my husband. I want to always be attractive to him. (Side note here... I saw a post once of a quilter who made fabric bags to go around colostomy bags to make them more appealing. I'd totally do that.)
Second, I am afraid of the possibility of not waking up. I am by no means afraid of the afterlife. I look forward to the day that I meet God in Heaven. I just do not feel like I have finished my life here. I don't want to leave my husband. What would happen to him? I also very much want to experience motherhood before I leave this life.
Lord, please bring peace to me and my husband during this wait and the surgery. We are in your hands. - Amen
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